AUTHOR'S CORNER;

POST WRITING BLUES

Once again I find myself overwhelmed with a deep sense of depression; the kind of depression which seeps in through your chest and spreads and engulfs your entire being until there seems absolutely no hope whatsoever...hope of what?  I don't know!  I feel uncomfortable, as if awaiting a tragedy, I feel fidgety and restless, my mind is racing and my eyes are tearful.  I have a dread which sits upon my heart and, frankly, I feel like I need to run!  And I know I should not be depressed, my logical mind tells me that I have a lot going for me, that my world is near perfection and my ambition on its way to being fulfilled.  So why the unnecessary and unwelcome sense of 

paranoia? 

Sometimes I suspect that I create the drama within the walls of my mind; that my mind has a tendency to flip and switch from euphoria to rock bottom depression within a split second.  I feel that the chemicals of my brain, or the connections or wiring, if you like, sometimes gets mixed and tangled and my mind just switches from one mood to another with no good reason!  My temper is such, my kindness is so... I seem to constantly tinker on the thin borders of happiness and sadness, calmness or nervousness, neediness or coldness!  

I often don't understand myself, only that I know that I am.  And indeed what I am depends very much on how I am.

But I can link it to one common source, my mood is played upon by my creativity; when I am writing I am a much better person, when I am not writing I am failing, (in my mind at least) and therefore I am not good, not in mind, emotions or indeed beauty!  I suffer from a disease that only plagues writers - in short, I suffer from the real world!  For my safe world is my computer, my imagination and the world in which I create.  The real world frightens me and puts me in my place.  And in the real world, my place is a very small, tight, insignificant little place and I feel suffocated!  

In short, like many a writer, I suffer from post writing blues!

If I am not writing, then I have to be me, and me is not always ready to face the world!

But in thinking about this, I can't help but come to the conclusion that this in itself is not a bad thing; it is after all what drives a writer to write and it is that sense of awkwardness with the world that makes us see it so much more clearly.  We are nothing more than mimes, who have chosen to use the pen as a means to express what we see.  And just like any mime, we are utterly hopeless and less than ordinary without our masks that hide so much from the world, yet enable us to say much more!

And much like a mime, we always approach our audience an empty, blank vessel and then pour out so much more as the act goes on!

AUTHOR'S CORNER;

IN A WORLD OF CELEBRITIES....

In a world jam packed with T.V. programmes, glossy magazines, YouTube clips and home made videos which are sprawled across the internet left right and centre.  Where reality television has made ordinary people into celebrities and given them right of way to stardom, where the trend is to follow the outrageous and to like what is simply visible on T.V. and to admire it and hold it in high esteem.  In this world, that has opened up doors and made available many an opportunity, and has been less discriminating against people, one can't help but feel that the more doors open willingly and easily for the masses, the less chance and space the ones with talent actually receive!

When there is a million dollars to be made out of a book deal with a celebrity who has appeared on a reality television show (regardless of whether the book is well written or not) and the fan base is already established, as opposed to a new writer (albeit talented) or a position on telly, or a chance for a recording deal...  all will go to the celebrity first.  Because (and I know I shouldn't start a sentence with because, but hey, I frankly don't care) in short, all one needs nowadays to get somewhere in life is to turn up on some obscure reality show, make a fool of themselves and get the public talking, albeit  they may be outraged, you'll still end up being famous and then anything, anything at all, your fickle little heart desires, you shall get!  

AM I RANTING?  A LITTLE!

Talent has become, alas, nothing more than a business!  You can be the most talented person on the planet, but if dim Tim from Big Brother is likely to sell more books, sell more records, get more ratings for a new game show, then dim Tim is the flavour of the month, and to hell with you Mr Nobody Talented Sad Person!

And what a shame, because the more Talent is diluted for the sake of what is trending, the more bad work is put out there the more we lower the standard and bring people's expectations down and thus create a sub-standard and soon, very soon and without prior warning, talent would be a thing of the past and all that we will have is crap!

IMAGINE BEING ENTERTAINED BY CRAP?

It reminds me when in the late seventies the government decided to lower the reading and maths standards so that every child could obtain and achieve; the result....many an adult with reading and arithmetic difficulties!  And yes I get it, publishers want to eat, T.V. channels want ratings, recording companies want  to sell, but come on!  Don't sacrifice everything you stood for for a load of celebrity crap which is  the demon that media has created and the serpent that will push your industries down!

NO WONDER MANY WRITERS, MUSICIANS, ARTISTS are going it alone and self producing their work!  

Remember the times of Fred Astaire, Marilyn Monroe, Elizabeth Taylor, Charles Dickens, Fay Weldon, Shirley Bassie, Tom Jones?  Remember when talent used to actually be talent?

Am I ranting?  Yes, and why?  Because I, like many others out there, am sick of seeing talentless people jumping the queue when there are so many talented people out there just waiting to catch a break!  

SORRY....NOW THAT I'VE GOT THAT OFF MY CHEST.....

I can go back to shining like a star!

AUTHOR'S CORNER;

SHAKESPEARE'S VALENTINE

So the romantic time of year has rolled up again and you just don't feel....romantic!   Posies, hearts and chocolate don't quite seem to cut it with your 'love' mood and neither does an episode of Two And A Half Men with a cup of tea and a cuddle with your partner seem to do it!  Bring back Charlie Sheen!  

You would think, that as an author and a composer of words and scenarios, you'd be able to conjure some sort of romantic ambience between you and your partner, to at least give St Valentine the recognition he deserves.  And certainly on television, our well accomplished actors are telling us this, they are showing us this, with an array of romantic movies and happy-ever-after fairytale endings!  If they can do it, why can't we?  

You look at your partner (who is oblivious to your concerns) and wonder if once again, you really have to go through the  motions of flower buying and trips to the cinema followed by a curry!  Of trying very hard (after like a lifetime of marriage) to whisper sweet nothings into your partner's ear and talk the 'sexy' talk!  You've said it all before!!!  Nothing will impress!  There is nothing your partner can say that will actually send frenzies of desire up and down your spine, there are no words powerful enough that could possibly conjure up the magic of imagination and unbridled youthful 'love-juices', worse, if you think that is bad, there is nothing you can actually say or do that will remotely move your partner in anyway, shape or form!

SHALL WE DIVORCE?

NO, DON'T....LET'S SEE WHAT UNCLE SHAKESPEARE HAD TO SAY.....

Let us take a look at good old William Shakespeare and try to understand from him how love should be viewed...  

1.  I WOULD NOT WISH ANY COMPANION IN THE WORLD BUT YOU!

(The Tempest)

When you are bored with your partner, look over at him/her and think to yourself, would you really, could you really, ever, ever, wish anyone else to be sat there on the sofa beside you watching yet another re-run of Friends?  If not, then my friends, there is love there....and yes, there is hope. 

2.  MY HEART IS EVER AT YOUR SERVICE.

(Timon of Athens)

In spite of the arguments, the irritations, ask yourself how do you really feel about the person you are with, do you, in that moment of clarity and silence, give yourself completely?  Would you sacrifice the world for him/her?  Are you happy when you make your partner happy?  Yes?  Good!

3.  LOVE LOOKS NOT WITH EYES, BUT WITH THE MIND.

(A Midsummer Night's Dream)

When you look across the room over to your partner, the same partner who has been with you for the past five, ten, fifteen, twenty or thirty years, what do you see?  Do you see an ageing, balding, wrinkling overweight person who has frankly seen better days?  Or do you see that young, vibrant man/woman of the summer of 89?  That same youthful person you fell in love with all those years ago!  If when you see your loved one, the grey hairs, the fat, the not so youthful complexion pales into insignificance and all you can see is him/her, then you are still in love sweetie!

4.  ABSENCE FROM THOSE WE LOVE IS SELF FROM SELF-A DEADLY     BANISHMENT

(A Midsummer Night's Dream)

Even though mostly your partner is beginning to drive you crazy, they nag, they demand and generally they moan about every thing they can moan about!  Their habits are irritating and they always turn the channel over when your have become engrossed in the programme that they have made you watch in the first place!  But ask yourself, can you survive without them?  Would you miss them terribly and be a good for nothing blubbering heap of wreckage if they went away?  You would?  Hold on to that thought!

5.  THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE NEVER DID RUN SMOOTH

(A Midsummer Night's Dream)

Think about it, it may have not been a fairytale, Hollywood, hyped up illusion of loved up couple; but then again, if it was, it would be sooo boring....YAWN!

6.  LOVE HAS MADE THEE A TAME SNAKE.

(Othello)

Since you've been with him/her, have you mellowed over the years?  Do you find yourself more tolerant of situations?  Are you generally a happier (albeit heavier) person?  If so, then this love has been good for you!

7.  LOVE SOUGHT IS GOOD, BUT GIVEN UNSOUGHT IS BETTER.

(Twelfth Night)

Yes it would be nice if he/she showed how much they love you more often!  It would be lovely to hear it, but remember, if you give your love freely, then more than likely they will give theirs!

8.  LET'S GO HAND IN HAND, NOT ONE BEFORE ANOTHER.

(The Comedy Errors)

Remember, you are a partnership, not competitors!  If love is to last and continue, then you must become one, not two separate entities!  

9.  O, SPIRIT OF LOVE, HOW QUICK AND FRESH ART THOU.

(Twelfth Night)

Finally, do you get moments, albeit fleeting seconds, when you look at your partner and feel as young and invigorated as the day you first met?

I THINK WE CAN CONJURE UP THE LOVE MOOD AFTER ALL!  HAPPY VALENTINES!