AUTHOR'S CORNER;

FADING INTO THE PAGES

The funny thing about getting what you want and having that overwhelming feeling of complete and utter joy, is that it only ever lasts a few minutes!  Euphoria was not meant to last forever; if it did we would all be absolutely helpless to carry on with life.  Once all the gaols have been achieved and the dream has been realised, there seems to be not much left, nowhere else to turn and certainly not many left who will listen or are in admiration of you!  Though they recognise your talent, and have praised you a thousand times. You've been told you are wonderful, they've given you all the feedback you desire, you should feel satisfied, the way you felt last month....but the feeling is not sustainable, because once all is said and done, there is not much left to say, and not much left to do!  The stillness seeps in... nothing happens, all that can happen has happened...now what?

You've written it, the pages on your book are filled, you've published and now, now you are sitting at your desk feeling empty.  In the last two years you had a goal, a purpose to live for; you were busy writing a novel, you were busy showing it to the publisher, proofreading and editing your work.  You were busy telling people about your pending work, you were busy living on the dream...living on the glory of that imagination of yours.  And last year, last year you were real, a real person trying to write a real novel....now you are a novelist who is only really alive within the pages of your book!

It is almost as if the reality has sort of made the realism of it all seem unreal....Is this how being published actually feels, lost?  It is as if the end point, the goal achieved has left  you redundant somehow; you've done it, now what?  Aren't you supposed to be enjoying all that fame?  What fame?  What should you do now, take a break?You can't take a break, because you simply don't know how to!  You are a writer...it is not a job, it is who you are. 

You feel like you have come to an anticlimax, you are at a dead end and the motivation has left you, not because you are unhappy with the outcome, but because you have simply burnt yourself out!  You've been racing for so long, you lost the breaks and now you've crashed!  The reason you are so uptight is because you have been trying so hard to achieve your goal, once it is achieved you are scared to sit back and relax, in case you are forgotten, or you suddenly lose that platform, or worse, you fade into the pages of your novel and never recover again!



BUT ASK YOURSELF.....

What makes you doubt your own success?  Why do you fear the quietness of a well earned break, and what makes you believe that you are forgotten?  It was exciting writing and getting the novel published, it was great having the first burst of praise from family and friends, but now it is time to let it do its magic, let it circulate, let people read it and know this, as long as somebody reads it, you will never fade into the pages of a book!  

NOW SIT BACK AT YOUR LAPTOP, AND START THE FIRST CHAPTER OF YOUR NEW NOVEL!

AUTHOR'S CORNER;

WRITE ME A NOVEL....

The decision has been made, you've told all your family and friends and you've even contemplated resigning from that bloody 9-5 humdrum of a job!  You've purchased the top of the range laptop (though all you really needed was the word processor) and you've even designed the front cover of your book....your very own first novel!  You're partner is unconvinced of your new found 'hobby' and is smiling at you in Cheshire cat fashion and is waiting for your enthusiasm to dwindle so that normal life can resume.  Your friends think that you have reached and unfortunately crashed into a mid-life crises and they treat you kindly, lest you have a nervous breakdown altogether!  Your parents tell you 'Well done, dear' like they used to when you were a child and delusionally presented them with a crayon drawing of a purple cat and a blue dog, in the hope to entice a feeling of self worth into your infantile little mind.  And every time you talk to someone about your pending book, you notice a flicker of a smile of contempt on their face, or an icy stare from behind smiling eyes, or a quick change of subject and a quick exit away from your company!  The only people who believe you will do it and have utmost faith in your abilities to write a novel are your children!

So, half defeated, half charged, you reluctantly stagger to your computer; all sense of enthusiasm has almost left your body and the only thing that is now driving you is sheer pride; you must not lose face!  You sit down, you switch your computer on and stare bewilderedly at the screen as you try to construct an opening sentence in your mind.  And once the noise of the family has died down and the cluttering in the kitchen has subsided and everyone is bored of hovering around you waiting for your failure, you find yourself surprisingly able to write a first chapter which amazingly is quite readable!  You sigh with great relief, the hurdle has been overcome; you have proven to them and yourself that you can actually write!   But wait....wait....wait a moment.....

Three months down the line, you are tapping your fingers on the desk because you have writer's block!  Five months down the line, you are not quite sure how on earth you are going to end the story, or worse, when to end it!  Seven months down the line you suddenly realise that you don't know how to go about  submitting the book! Eight months down the line you are writing very badly written letters begging (yes begging) publishers to take you on!  Ten months down the line you read your work again and realise with a cringe that some of the sentences and some of the spelling have been written in your sleep.  Twelve months down the line you are wanting to call it a day, but pride won't let you!  And by month fourteen the rejection letters start coming in hard and fast!!!  And all the while your partner smiles slyly at you and there is a strange look of mirth in their eyes!  

DON'T GIVE UP; REMEMBER ALL THE GREATEST WRITERS HAVE GONE THROUGH THIS BEFORE YOU!  HERE ARE SOME USEFUL QUOTES TO HELP YOU GET THINGS IN PROSPECTIVE!

To be successful you must expect failure, because one does not come without the other! If you have never failed, there is nothing to succeed and if you have never succeeded there is nothing to fail!  If you stop at the first sign of failure, how will you know if you can succeed?

 

Success is not the end  result of simply publishing the novel; success is the culmination of day in, day out of writing and persisting and refining your work! Success is the commitment you show to something you really want to do; publishing is a very small factor in the matter!

If you get ready mentally and expect that you do face a long road ahead of you, then that road will be endured.  You must prepare for the writer's block, for the rejection letters and for the difficulties you will face just to get noticed!  And you must do your homework and research your field!

That's right; please no one, just do what comes naturally, don't copycat other writers and don't worry about what others think!

If you are a real writer, then writing is on your blood and it doesn't matter who believes you can write or who doesn't, all that should matter is what you believe about yourself!

That's right, who cares if you are published or not?  Is the publisher going to really validate what you know you are?  You are the writing, you are the pen, you are that because that is what you are!

And if other's think your writing is a bit dark, a bit moody, a little outrageous!  Well then, you're doing your job right!

Don't worry, your imaginary friends are a little tired, they've gone on a vacation, they'll soon be back!

If you want to thrill the audience you have to first scare yourself!

Yes indeed, it is as simple as that, all you really have to do is sit at your typewriter and bleed!  Bleed out all those weird, warped, pent-up emotions that have made you a writer in the first place!

And finally always remember....there are three massive hurdles for any writer to get over, but once over them.... 

THIS IS WHAT EVENTUALLY HAPPENS!

AUTHOR'S CORNER;

PUT YOUR LAPTOP AWAY AND START SAVING YOUR MARRIAGE!

I feel it is time dear friends to address an issue that most modern day women, in their bid to be independent, chose to ignore and attribute it to some old fashioned, outdated, primitive notion!  The issue is simply keeping one's marriage alive... making sure so to speak, that the marriage vows have a pulse and a beating heart by which to live! Yes being modern has its advantages, and as a modern female, I must admit, I have thoroughly enjoyed the perks of the age.  I am a mother of four, a writer and in this modern day, a very free agent. There is no one to tell me that I can't, nobody to dictate life and certainly no society that will look dawn on me!  I am happy and content and fulfilled and thank God that I was born into this modern day, unlike dear old grandma, (who could have been a doctor, had her parents or society saw fit to educate her) I enjoy full human rights and relish in the fact that I am an independent woman!

So the problem?  Well, like many strong females of my generation, I am determined to get ahead in life at the cost (without realising it) of almost anything.  I am proud of the fact that I am a writer, and want to be the best writer I can be; I am willing to work hard at it and already I have enough finished unpublished novels in my filing cabinet to keep me in books for another seven years!  But yet I still write, each and every single day, knowing that only with determination I will one day be very successful.  Naturally my family are very proud of me; my husband has developed a fond look in his eyes every time he looks at me, and he has been known to sing my praises!  But alas, and I say this with a tinge of sadness and a guilty heart, when I am in the swing of a novel, I forget to remember him.  He is often shafted in the background, with hardly any attention and a bad tempered wife in the mix!

We went out last night, after many a months of not doing so, and as I looked over at him in the glint of the dim theatre lights, I realised just how much this poor angel has had to put up with; needless to say, I am a creative person and a total nightmare to live with!  I am heavy, loud and often completely obsessed with my novel and the characters within it.  I am tired and angry when I am blocked and over excited and distracted when I am in the full swing of writing! In short, I am lucky to still be married!

The poor man looks frustrated and fed up, though he'll never say it!  He just walks around as though everything is normal, it's a wonder I actually notice!

It's a miracle I take note of the fact that he is fed up, because he never pulls his hair out or shows me any anger...

no he never shows me, subtlety is his strong point!

SO IN AN ATTEMPT TO SAVE MY MARRIAGE I MADE SOME CHANGES, AND WILL GLADLY PASS THEM ON TO FELLOW FEMALE WRITERS.....

1.  Never lose your temper at your husband, just because your going through a writer's block!  They don't appreciate this and may store it for a time when you happen to be vulnerable!

2. Stop reading bits of your writing to the poor man, he doesn't understand the plot, he can't figure out your style, and he quite frankly doesn't give a damn!  Especially when the football is on!!

3. And stop talking to him about books, books books, or publishers, publishers, publishers, or agents, or book store....STOP IT!!

4. Stop making your books his burden!

5. Would it kill you to visit the kitchen once in a while?  You will be surprised to learn that your husband would love to be presented with a decent meal once in a while!

6. Put effort into your cooking!  A man appreciates an edible meal.

7.  I know you've been busy writing....but seriously? How is that presentable?

 8.  Time to visit the beautician, let's see what they can do!

9. You might also like to try cleaning the house up a little, a cobweb free environment will do wonders for your love life!

10. Remember, when you do have time for your hubby, try not to discuss YOUR WRITING!!!

11.  Instead, spend some quality time together, like normal couples!

12.  Allow Cupid to mingle amongst you.....

Feel the love......

Remember why you married.....

and remember.....

You will eventually grow old together, and when all the novels have been written, and all the books have been published, and the kids have all grown up and left home, and you're no longer remembered in the book   stores, you will only have him; your faithful husband, the man who has put up you!

AUTHOR'S CORNER;

BARBECUING THE NOVEL!

So, I've managed to survive the winter, the school year and the proofreading and successful publishing of my latest novel; the year has simply flown by darlings, and I am dead proud of myself!  

Surely now that summer has graced us with its presence, and I no longer have to bother about school, writing my next masterpiece ought to be easy!  I mean, the days are longer, brighter, and certainly warmer!  The bees are buzzing and the birds are tweeting, inspiration, right?

UMM....THINK AGAIN YOUNG ASPIRING WRITERS!

IT'S NOT THAT EASY, BABY!

Whilst winter brought with it misery and dread, not to mention an underlying depression (which doctors have failed to diagnose, in my opinion) and a sense of darkened failing in life, which can only be equated to doomsday!  Whilst winter brought with it rain, sleet and frost, whilst it whisked up spirals of wind and whirls of leaves, whilst winter blew and shoved you down the street on a daily basis!  Whilst winter brought with it a grey sky, bare trees, and a short supply of sunlight and absolutely no vitamin D, it also brought with it the warmth of indoors, the compulsion to stay home, the short, cosy nights and the toasty slippers that kissed your feet!

There was not much reason to look out of your window in winter, there was no need to stroll up and down the neighbourhood, there was no desire to tend to the garden.  There was however, great entertainment in spending many a boring winter day in the novel plot, only to be able to flit the boring winter nights away by writing your novel!

BUT SUMMER?

Well summer came with an unexpected, yet half anticipated force of energy, much like a Flamenco dancer entering a stage!  The sun suddenly shone, and that great big heater in the sky was turned up by a whopping twenty degrees and suddenly the bees and the birds seemed to awake to a chorus of Rock'n Robin!  People suddenly emerged from their houses clad in shorts and vests and summer dresses, not to mention jewellery they normally wouldn't be seen dead in!  Traffic suddenly and curiously increased and car horns could be heard all over the neighbourhood, and road rage sang to the tune of 'Get out my bleeding way!' and 'Shut-up!'  All this I was forced to witness from the window which my desk is situated by, and from which I receive my finest inspirations!

And the sight of summer strangely did not make for a calming state of mind, instead, it excited me and woke me from my lazy existence.  I felt fidgety at my desk!

And my garden looked like a proper garden!

And I could hear the sound of children playing!  And I was intrigued!

My husband started using the Barbecue once again and although he would normally profess to be a useless chef, he conjured up dishes that would make Jamie Oliver weep!  

And where before my friends and family could not be bothered to phone me, the sunlight had temporarily taken them out of their senses; for they rang, and rang and rang at all hours of the day!

  

And seeing as the children were doing me a favour by gracing me with their lovely company (huh) they required feeding, so I had to take time out of my writing to go shopping.........

and shopping.....and shopping!

I'm sure the supermarket manager thought I was stalking him; I started addressing him by his first name!!

And grandparents (who normally can't be bothered to come round) decided to visit, because they missed us (huh) suddenly!

And suddenly, as if by some sort of sordid Voodoo magic, my entire family tree emerged

which was strange, as only last winter they were nowhere to be seen!  But wait... it gets worse.....

HIS entire family tree emerged!!  Notice how significantly bigger his family tree is?  There were weddings and barbecues and parties and funerals to attend!  Not to mention they all expected an invite back! Well, unless I get married, have an unexpected birthday or suddenly die, they've got a long wait!!

But they all, without exception expected to be offered a cup of tea!

I'm a writer, not a tea lady!!

So after much agonising, (and it's only been a week, mind) I have decided to lay down my hat.....

understand that writing will simply not be done!


The best thing to do is to ... chill!

And just....