THE GARDEN OF EDEN;
THE TROUBLE WITH MEN...
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When Eve complained that she was the one who had the babies and at the amount of pain she had to go through, Adam laughed at her and said, 'Oh suck it up Eve, you were made for this type of thing, besides, do you know how painful it was for me to part with a whole rib just so that you could come about?'
When Eve happened to mention in passing about the problems she had to go through being a woman, and how her hormone levels would fluctuate depending on the time of the month, Adam simply replied, 'Oh for goodness' sake Eve, there you go again complaining, for God's sake woman, you are a woman! And besides had that whole incident with the forbidden fruit not happen then perhaps the curse would have not been upon you!'
When Eve rubbed Almond oil onto her sore breasts after feeding the twins and moaned in sorrow at her discomfort, Adam sneered and shook his head. 'There you go again,' he said, 'complaining about the natural, what do you think they are there for?' he asked pointing at her breasts. 'How could you say they hurt when God made them for the purpose of feeding?'
When Eve caught the flu and her lips blistered and her nose went red and her eyes drooped, Adam simply shrugged and said 'Just a little sniffle then?' And he expected his dinner on time and the cave to be cleaned as usual and the children to be bathed and fed and put to bed. He expected his loin cloths to be washed and ready for the next day; as he had a very important meeting with the other Adams. And when Eve finally threw herself into bed late that evening, Adam sheepishly requested that she go and put the Catasourous out for the night, and bring him back a drink from the spring in their garden. And how he mocked and teased poor Eve over the next few days, about her over reaction to such a minor chill.
A few weeks later while Adam was busy relaxing and eating his freshly cooked meal, he felt a tingle run up his nose, and his eyes became hot and heavy, he felt a fuzz surround his head and all of a sudden he let out a SNEEZE! Immediately he jumped to his feet and then collapsed again in his chair. 'OOOH,' he moaned loudly so that the entire neighbourhood could hear. 'Oh, oh, ahh, ahh!' he cried as he rubbed his head and patted his chest. 'What is it Adam?' asked Eve as she came to his aid. 'What is wrong with you?' Adam patted his head and moaned weakly. 'Are you hurt?' asked Eve as she came up to him for closer inspection. 'Have you hurt your head?' she asked. Adam shook his head and patted his chest. 'Have you hurt your chest?' asked Eve. 'Did someone shoot an arrow at you?' Adam shook his head and held onto his side. 'Have you fallen on your side and broke a rib?' asked his poor wife. Adam finally looked up at his wife and sneezed once more.
He looked up at his wife and sneezed again and breathed heavily and moaned pathetically. 'You've got the sniffles?' asked Eve. Adam shook his head and with a look of betrayal he said 'It's a bit more than the sniffles!'
'A cold then?' said Eve.
'A bit more than that,' he said.
'A really bad cold?' she offered.
'More,' he snarled, 'have you no sensitivity?'
'Flu?' she said reluctantly.
'Woman have you lost your senses? Do you no longer care for your husband? The husband who gave up a whole rib for you, who sacrificed his happiness and freedom and let you have his children. The husband who has to endure your fluctuating hormone levels and mood swings! have you no more kindness left in that hardened body of yours?' ranted Adam. 'What I have is a very serious illness indeed, I may never recover and then where will you be?'
'But what is it?' asked Eve feeling worried.
'It is...' said Adam with a doomed look upon his face. 'It is...MAN FLU!!!!' he said as he buried his head in his hands and stumbled off to bed!
When Eve happened to mention in passing about the problems she had to go through being a woman, and how her hormone levels would fluctuate depending on the time of the month, Adam simply replied, 'Oh for goodness' sake Eve, there you go again complaining, for God's sake woman, you are a woman! And besides had that whole incident with the forbidden fruit not happen then perhaps the curse would have not been upon you!'
When Eve rubbed Almond oil onto her sore breasts after feeding the twins and moaned in sorrow at her discomfort, Adam sneered and shook his head. 'There you go again,' he said, 'complaining about the natural, what do you think they are there for?' he asked pointing at her breasts. 'How could you say they hurt when God made them for the purpose of feeding?'
When Eve caught the flu and her lips blistered and her nose went red and her eyes drooped, Adam simply shrugged and said 'Just a little sniffle then?' And he expected his dinner on time and the cave to be cleaned as usual and the children to be bathed and fed and put to bed. He expected his loin cloths to be washed and ready for the next day; as he had a very important meeting with the other Adams. And when Eve finally threw herself into bed late that evening, Adam sheepishly requested that she go and put the Catasourous out for the night, and bring him back a drink from the spring in their garden. And how he mocked and teased poor Eve over the next few days, about her over reaction to such a minor chill.
A few weeks later while Adam was busy relaxing and eating his freshly cooked meal, he felt a tingle run up his nose, and his eyes became hot and heavy, he felt a fuzz surround his head and all of a sudden he let out a SNEEZE! Immediately he jumped to his feet and then collapsed again in his chair. 'OOOH,' he moaned loudly so that the entire neighbourhood could hear. 'Oh, oh, ahh, ahh!' he cried as he rubbed his head and patted his chest. 'What is it Adam?' asked Eve as she came to his aid. 'What is wrong with you?' Adam patted his head and moaned weakly. 'Are you hurt?' asked Eve as she came up to him for closer inspection. 'Have you hurt your head?' she asked. Adam shook his head and patted his chest. 'Have you hurt your chest?' asked Eve. 'Did someone shoot an arrow at you?' Adam shook his head and held onto his side. 'Have you fallen on your side and broke a rib?' asked his poor wife. Adam finally looked up at his wife and sneezed once more.
He looked up at his wife and sneezed again and breathed heavily and moaned pathetically. 'You've got the sniffles?' asked Eve. Adam shook his head and with a look of betrayal he said 'It's a bit more than the sniffles!'
'A cold then?' said Eve.
'A bit more than that,' he said.
'A really bad cold?' she offered.
'More,' he snarled, 'have you no sensitivity?'
'Flu?' she said reluctantly.
'Woman have you lost your senses? Do you no longer care for your husband? The husband who gave up a whole rib for you, who sacrificed his happiness and freedom and let you have his children. The husband who has to endure your fluctuating hormone levels and mood swings! have you no more kindness left in that hardened body of yours?' ranted Adam. 'What I have is a very serious illness indeed, I may never recover and then where will you be?'
'But what is it?' asked Eve feeling worried.
'It is...' said Adam with a doomed look upon his face. 'It is...MAN FLU!!!!' he said as he buried his head in his hands and stumbled off to bed!
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